“Laughter is an instant vacation.” said Milton Berle. Here at NK, we would like to contribute to lightening your mood in preparation for a meaningful and relaxed weekend. So here’s the tongue- in-cheek look at the events of the week gone by that you’ve been waiting for….
The union government early this week advised TV channels not to air advertisements selling and promoting condoms between 6AM and 10PM because “these are indecent especially for children” and can create “unhealthy practices” among them. The missive came after the Advertising Standards Council of India (ASCI) requested the ministry earlier this month to take a call on such ads and their telecast timing.The irony is that what is seen during the day is used at night, and not the other way around – and if not seen, may not be used which makes for an unhealthy practice – given the consequences. Please note this column has no space for such detail, so wake up early and check the ads for more. While there may be more children in our already demographically young country as a result of this advisory, surely there will be fewer unhealthy practices among them and that is a good thing!
Over the last few years, at least until Nov. 8th last year, whenever I’ve visited a grocery store or a supermarket for minor purchases, I was left biting an eclair on the way out (Recently I’ve been able to pay digitally, saving my teeth from cavities, my waist from waste, and my pancreas from shutting down) – because there were no coins. They had already been bitten and swallowed before – Today those bitcoins are worth a record 12000+ USD each and our financial supermarkets still don’t have them, but want them real bad. Their future is cryptic, and as they rise like the phoenix because their supply is limited by unknown factors (unlike the rupee, they do not have to support wasteful expenditure), the Banks are waiting in the wings to grab them from your mouth – no matter if they are bit – and swallow them whole!
But that is in the distant future!. In the immediate future the banks may have another plan for you and your rupee deposits in them! Based on the information going around on Social Media and in the Press, they would like to bail you into their NPA mess even as they bail themselves and the loan defaulters out!
At present, all deposits up to Rs. 1 lakh are protected under the Deposit Insurance and Credit Guarantee Corporation Act but in reality, the protection has never been in question and therefore depositors like you and me rested complacent. If what appears in the media is to be believed, with the FRDI Bill, (which has been cleared by the Union Cabinet and is with a joint Committee of Parliament), the term Fixed Deposit will take on whole new meaning! ? Fixed will be flexible and “promise to repay” may be more a toothpaste tube than a promise. (Promise is a brand of toothpaste that was launched in 1978 by Balsara hygiene in India). The Banks can press it anywhere at any time, limiting the toothpaste outflow to the size a toothbrush head! Economic prudence at its best! So while the borrowers enjoy their afternoon siesta, the depositors have to stay wide awake all through the day, and maybe at night too – They should, for it’s their hard earned money, not money borrowed from the banks!
Meanwhile, despite the ongoing Gujarat elections, economic reforms are well on track. A uniform price code for the nation goal seems closer than it appears in your mirror! Consumer Inflation rose to nearly5% and food inflation doubled within a monthto 4. 41% fuelled by the rise in vegetable prices which may not have a uniform size, shape or colour but are fast acquiring a uniform price point.
Italy was in the news…. again, this time for all the right reasons, when our favourite couple, Virat and Anushka, landed there secretly (not in an Augusta Westland Helicopter surely) and tied the knot amid friends and family at a resort. For a couple that is so much in the public eye for all that they have achieved and all that they do, it is surprising that India’s much acclaimed 4th pillar did not pillory them before they left!. Though some media reports suggest it was in the making for a year, it is wonderful how they kept it a secret in this day and age, when everyday every channel proudly says “Stand by for an sensational and exclusive news break “. Politicians have a lot to learn from them. Yes, they managed to elope in a sense – so exciting it must have been – leaving us ordinary Indians terribly disappointed as we were not allowed to watch what must have been a spectacular ceremony live on TV – our favourite pastime… Despite the ceremony having taken place in Italy, there have so far not been any demands for a CBI investigation!
And now a news item that appeared on December 12th – The headline went thus: Breaking taboo, kissing competition organised in India for the first time – The lip-lock competition was held in Pakur’s Dumaria village, which is around 321 kilometres from Jharkhand’s capital Ranchi. Pakur is one of the backward regions of the state. Surprisingly, kissing was cherished as sport and was organised by a member of legislative assembly of Jharkhand MuktiMorcha, Simon Marandi on December 9. The Kissing Competition had one rider – it was restricted to married couples and according to reports 20 couples participated. The purpose – to strengthen the bond of love between couples. ‘The competition has been organised to increase bond between couples and check growing divorce cases among the tribals,” said Marandi while talking to the media. The competition was organized as a part of a fair which also had, interestingly archery as a competition! The grapevine has it that far more couples participated in this competition!
Collusion, Collaboration and Interference, words that demonstrate command over the English language, dominated the last days of the Gujarat Election campaign just as they did the final days of the US presidential Election late last year. There the similarity ended. The beauty of such narratives is that, when repeated a hundred times, even if they are forgotten 24 hours later, as they normally are when new narratives take over, they remain in the subconscious, involuntarily stuck in the frontal lobe (associated with reasoning, planning, parts of speech, movement, emotions, and problem solving) and interfere with rational thought. (Social Media, TV channels and political speeches work on this premise) However in such cases being rational is a pre-requisite!
The view from high above the water and the view from a bullet train are alike (it’s called a bird’s eye view)– a vast emptiness that whizzes past the roving eye, the passenger visible to focussed TV screens, but invisible to the naked eye. The views are soothing, the spectacle alluring, and the fame instant and useful in the short run. The marathon is another matter altogether – you actually have to run!
In the midst of the delightful news that a legislator from Jharkhand was attempting to strengthen the bonds of love among couples committed to each other came a shocker from UP – A minor, a 15-year-old blood cancer survivor was gang-raped by two persons, one of whom was known to the victim and then when she pleaded for help from a passer-by, she was again raped by him too. This news was beyond tragic, and wiped out all the humour in me – This is why I left it for the last.
Madhya Pradesh recently led the way in strengthening the law regarding rape, but more than deterrence and the law, it is the mindset of men that needs to be altered. This can only be done when they are young, so change must begin at home and in our schools – not just the upscale ones, but in every school. Equal treatment of boys and girls when they are kids both at home, at school and in society is the key. It teaches respect for each other’s abilities,reveals the interdependent nature of the genders and changes the way we think about each other. But is it too much to ask? Hope lies eternal.
Have a good weekend!
